During our journey to launching my husband in his new career, we changed communities three times in three years.
While we love adventures, being new to so many communities was tiring.
Who loves making new friends as an adult?
ha ha Let's change that, shall we?
I have learned that even women who have had lifelong friendships still struggle with deep friendships.
I believe that we are the sum of our community and that by showing up for one another, we make the world a better place.
I wanted to share a little bit of what I've learned from being new so that we can contribute to our community by making new friends and showing up as good friends.
Go Scared - making friends as an adult can be scary, do it anyway. Show up, introduce yourself, and be brave!
Make optimistic assumptions - okay, so it looks like everyone is hanging out without you and maybe they are. Let go of the negativity that leads you to believe you're intentionally being excluded. It is exhausting to continue feeding a negative story, so let it go. Choose to believe the best in people.
Get involved locally - host a neighborhood party, frequent local businesses, become a fan of where you live, and make promoting the hometown one of your favorite things to do.
Give yourself grace - friend, making friends takes time. I know you don't want to hear that but research shows that it can take 2-5 years to feel at home after a move. If you're making new friendships, treat it like a garden - beautiful flowers take time!
Do the hard work - making friends is hard work. We're a busy society & remembering and showing up for events takes intentionality. Schedule & set reminders to be a good friend. It is not only important, I believe it's essential to the well-being of ourselves and our community.
Remember the New Girl - if you're no longer the New Girl in town, remember what it was like to be her and reach out. Invite her into your space, even if you already have all the friendship boxes checked. We need each other.
I'd love to hear, have you ever been new to a space? Moved or had a new season changed your current friendships?
Comment below and let me know if you resonate with being new to friendships or tell me which one of these tips hits home for you!
There is a real person here (wink, wink - it's me) and I'd love to grow together and build a beautiful community with YOU!
We're better together, friend, and I'm so glad we are.